Periodically ask yourself: "How am I feeling?" "What challenges do I face?" "What direct actions could I take to solve them?" For instance, if you're angry with someone, try talking it out instead of reaching for food when you're not hungry.

Using food this way is very common. People eat to reward themselves, celebrate occasions, and entertain others, often allowing food to become the center of social activity. People also eat to calm their nerves and comfort themselves. Many use food to numb themselves from emotional pain, hoping food can stifle anger, rejection, or sorrow. Almost all of us are ruled by habit. We eat when the clock tells us to—even when we're not hungry.

Separating hunger from other needs
Successful weight management usually involves developing new insights about emotions, social situations, and food. First, it's helpful to acknowledge that overeating may have served a useful purpose in helping you get through stressful events. But now it's possible to come up with other ways to meet your emotional needs.

Next, it helps to recognize the difference between hunger signals—internal cues of hunger and fullness—and emotional need. This sounds straightforward, but many people confuse the physical discomfort of sadness, anger, and fear with the physical discomfort of needing food. You may "feel hungry" all the time because you've been conditioned to substitute food for more directly meeting many emotional needs.

Handling emotional triggers
How can you untangle your emotional connections to food? One way is to use a food diary to identify emotional triggers. Keep an accurate record for at least one week of what you eat, when, and where. Include how you feel when you were eating. Ask yourself: What happened today to make me feel this way? You may discover patterns that reveal the emotional cues that cause you to turn to food.

Once you've tracked down a pattern, try to find an alternative to eating that will soothe your emotions. For instance, you might find out that your worst food binges happen on Sunday nights, just as you're anticipating a tough week at the office. Or maybe your eating seems most out of control around your parents, who find fault with your new love interest. Try to deal directly with your anger. Call a friend and vent your feelings. Take a career class. Talk to a counselor. If you're lonely, reach out to other people. Join a health club. Plan a vacation.

Stress-related eating
Stress deserves particular attention. More than two-thirds of overweight adults report that they eat when they're stressed. When you're stressed out, you may eat too much or make unhealthy food choices, such as reaching for a bag of potato chips when you otherwise would eat fruit.

Fortunately, many strategies can reduce or eliminate stress:

• Eliminate some sources of stress. If you feel constantly overwhelmed and stressed out by everyday hassles, you may not be able to control your eating routines. Set priorities. Save your energy for the most important people and activities. Simplify your life. Share and delegate responsibilities.
• Better time management may help. Get organized by making a daily "To Do" list—keep it realistic and don't try to cram in too many activities. Use a marker board at home to track tasks. Be assertive: Permit yourself to say "no" the next time someone calls you to volunteer for the latest community project.
• Manage stress. Some sources of stress, like conflict on the job or in the family, can't be avoided. But you can use problem-solving skills to soften their impact. First, identify the problem that's making you feel angry or anxious. Then step by step, start gathering information and looking for resources. Devise a plan, put it in place, and watch what happens. If it doesn't work, ask why, revise your plan, and try again.
• Burn off stress. Exercise regularly to release tension and drain stress-producing hormones circulating in your body. Choose exercises that you enjoy, or else the exercise itself can be stressful. Milder physical activity, such as after-dinner walks and gardening, and relaxation activities (meditation, yoga, or t'ai chi) are other soothing ways to dissolve stress. Informal breaks also can help. If you feel tempted by food, find a quiet place and do some simple stretches combined with deep, slow breathing.